Wala naman palang Santa Claus!

After a long time, ngayon na lang ulit ako nagka-crush. Yung tipong hindi mo magawang maging ikaw sa harap niya dahil nalulunod ka na sa pagiging "conscious" mo. Hindi ka makatawa na kita ang ngala ngala mo. Ni hindi mo din ma-share ang balahura humor mo dahil baka isipin niyang hindi ka disenteng babae. Dapat, pag nandiyan siya, hindi ka mang babad mouth ng tao.

I think it all boils down to being presentable. In a way, you were trying to be perceived as a probable partner. Meaning, eventhough you aren't aware (yet) of the standards of this certain person that you are eyeing, there is a certain template that was lodged inside your head. This template was created through the help of your own experiences, rumors from your girlfriends, society's expectations, Hollywood films, and Star Cinema's chic flick.
Here are some examples:
1. You should not laugh so much as it distorts your face and it implies that you can't seem to control yourself.
2. Cursing. A lady does not curse. Since cursing seem to be the antonym of decent.
3. During discussion over bottles of alcohol, you wanted to bad mouth your friend but doing so will decrease your inner beauty score.
4. Your appetite just made a landslide descent. You wanted to welcome the sticks of hotdog with marshmallows inside your mouth but you can't seem to do so. He might think that having you as a girlfriend will entail loads of bucks during your dinner date. Of course, you wanted him to perceive that you are health and figure conscious.

Ilang araw na rin na iniisip ko, paano pag nagkita kami ulit. Ano dapat ang suot ko? Maganda dapat ang make-up ko. At higit sa lahat, hindi ko siya papansinin. Dahil ang tunay na babae ay pakipot. CHAROT!

Katulad ng palabas ng Sex and The City, mahilig talaga mag interpret ang mga babae. Por que, nagkaron kayo ng eye contact, tinagayan ka ng alak, natawa sa joke mo, nagkaron kayo ng quasi-conversation sa status ng common friend, parehas kayo ng trip na kanta, natatawa kayo sa isang palabas, at nababanggit ka pag may kausap siyang iba, eh feeling mo tumataas ang score mo bilang "probable partner". Hindi talaga healthy ang pag-iinterpret, dahil madalas hindi naman ito objective. Madaling i-twist ang mga detalye para lumabas na type ka niya. Endorphin galore ang nasa brains ko kapag ito ang naiisip ko. Kaya nitong pasayahin ang aking buhay ng halos isang araw.

So, mga ilarang araw ko ginawa ang interpretation. Ilang araw din akong may self-inflicted natural euphoria. Pero, kung titignan talaga, ng walang halong Sex and The City interpretation, friendly lang ang tao, hindi niya ako type. Nung napagtanto ko yun, naramdaman ko yung naramdaman ko ng nalaman kong wala naman palang Santa Claus.